On Becoming a Finfer

Joe and I went to see Black Christmas for our first date on Christmas day in 2006 then went for Chinese food. Shortly after that I started doodling his last name with my first name on any piece of paper I could get my hands on. And one year ago today I said ‘I Do’ to the Love of My Life. Today we will be spending a lovely day together at The Lake Austin Spa & Resort to celebrate. In honor of our first anniversary, I wanted to share our engagement story with you…as written by my handsome husband Joe.

The Engagement

How do you describe something as beautiful as a rainbow? As gentle as a baby deer? As joyous as Christmas morning?

These are all valid questions, but I’m not here to discuss rainbows, deers or Christmases.

Jareth Gets One Right

It all started as an offhand comment at the bowling alley (classy) early in the summer of ’08. “I think I’m going to ask Trish to marry me.” I didn’t talk about it again for a while, but it never left my head.

I’m pretty sure I knew fairly early on in our relationship that this was it. Trish puts up with my laziness, my need to always be right, and my strange sense of “humor”. She makes me laugh, makes me think, and makes me feel at home wherever I am. I don’t know how to describe it other than we just fit.

I finally made the decision and started the process of letting the family know. Missy first, then Mom and Dad. This was around the end of August, and we had a cruise in early October. Of course, the cruise was the most sensible time to pop the question, but a little too obvious for my taste (I’ve never claimed to be sensible). So, the family was sworn to secrecy.

How was I going to do this? I had no idea… Missy sent me a message asking this very question. I said a nice dinner and then the question or something like that. She said that wasn’t really my style, and I should plan a movie night. This evolved into her and Amy coming into town for “work”, and a family brunch the morning after. It was decided… two weeks after the cruise, we would have a movie night since Missy and Amy were coming into town. It took a little more convincing for my friends(which eventually turned into having to share the secret with a bigger crowd), but Daniele was willing to let me have the weekend of October 25.

My Grandmother left her engagement ring for me should I ever take the step, but the diamond had to be moved from my mother’s ring back into the original band. We made a trip to Dallas to celebrate my parent’s Anniversary, I got the ring (see the Blog for more ring details) and snuck it back home to hide until the day.

Jareth Gets One Right, Part Deux

So where was I? Yeah… I had just gotten Grandma’s ring and hidden it at the house. The ring sat in a small Christmas tin in the dresser for a couple months while the day approached; only being removed for the appraisal to get it insured (so romantic).

Trish had suggested a while back that we do a Labyrinth themed movie night, so I figured that was the perfect cover. We went on the cruise, which was wonderful, and came back with two weeks to prepare for the movie night. During these two weeks, I tried to come up with the perfect thing to say. I’m not so good with the sharing my feelings, so the nerves started to kick in.

I had to come up with a way to divert attention since so many people knew what was coming. First, the costume. I’m sure everyone has seen my Jareth costume…Trish did an amazing job putting this thing together for me, as well as doing the make-up. Not only do I enjoy getting into costume, but it served as a great distraction. Second, Trish asked for a Coach keychain to support the Susan G. Komen foundation (breast cancer awareness: be aware!). I finally knew exactly how this was going to go down.

The big night. Movie screen set up in the backyard, friends and family mingling, and Trish and I strutting in costume. I don’t know how much of the movie I actually watched… nerves distracting me, wanting to make sure no one left before the real event of the evening. After the movie, Trish had a quiz planned with some prizes. This was the perfect time for me to collect the ring and prepare the final distraction. After the quiz, I called for quiet.

Is this it?

Am I finally going to do this?

Not quite yet.

After going through a poorly worded speech of how much I loved Trish and never tell her, I presented her with a small package.

What could it be?

She opened the box to find the keychain she asked for. I think she was a little confused because she started to tell the story of asking for it, and what it meant. As she spoke, I reached into the waistline of my pants and grabbed the small box stashed there.

“Oh my God! It’s in his pants!” Oh, Robin.

“Yeah, one more thing…” open box, look at Trish, “Will you marry me?”

Applause, applause, champagne and congratulations all around. The deed was done, and we were engaged. I was happy and relieved.

So that’s the story as I remember it. There is only one thing I would do different if I could. I did not talk with Trish’s parents beforehand. Trudy and Will should have been involved. They have both been so gracious and welcoming to me, and I am happy I get to be a part of their family.

That’s What She Said…

 

And if anyone was wondering, I was totally thrown off track when Joe pulled out that keychain!! I thought when he started doing his speech that he was going to propose (since Joe is never as verbose or as public with his feelings). So when he pulled out the coach box containing the keychain I had asked for instead of a ring box, I tried to hide my disapointment by making this speech about the Race for the Cure coming up. Little did I know…I was being tricked!

And what did I say? I said “Of Course!” - just as soon as I could speak.